It’s the sad truth, Harm Your Relationship when the honeymoon period ends (which inevitably ends up happening). And couples fall into a familiar, comfortable routine, bad habits – taking each other for granted. Not spending quality time together, having a negative attitude. Can set in and threaten to damage your relationship.
We asked Kate Taylor, Match.com’s Resident Relationship Specialist, for her top tips for stifling these potentially destructive behaviors in the bud.
Bad Habit #1: Being Negative
According to Kate, “If you’re the one who’s negative – you complain about your job. Feel down and don’t want to do anything. The secret is not to overwhelm your partner. with all that. Spread the load among several friends, your family and maybe even (if you’ve been depressed for a while already) SharekAlomre your doctor. Not only will others give you what your partner can’t, but you’ll oppress them less and have more quality time together.
If it’s your partner who is negative, listen to them as much as possible, then gently suggest that they discuss the problem with someone who will be better able to Harm Your Relationship help them. Don’t think you have to play shrink; if you spend your time listening to your partner’s problems, who will listen to yours? »
Bad habit n°2: Not spending privileged moments together
According to Kate: “Staying home together is a natural step in the life of a couple. It’s intimate, simple, fun, and it doesn’t cost much! But one-on-one evenings at home quickly lose their charm. Because not only aren’t you putting as much effort into your appearance, but you’ll be interrupted by household chores. Maintain the glamor and fun of going out by scheduling dates at least every two weeks. You don’t have to spend the money picnics, walks, museums and art galleries are free, and you won’t have to break the bank for a few drinks at the bistro. Look online for discounts and deals at local eateries, or go to fancy places for lunch rather than dinner, it’s usually a lot cheaper.
If your partner is the stay-at-home type, challenge them to come up with some fun date ideas. Take turns finding new things to do. The little competitive nudge should get him off the couch. »
Bad Habit #3: Taking Your Partner For Granted – Harm Your Relationship
Says Kate: “Each year when Match compiles the Lovegeist Report, the UK’s largest independent study of relationships, we find that small gestures of love are far more valued than grand, extravagant adventures. Kindness and thoughtfulness is the way to go. Oftentimes, it’s just a matter of listening — if your partner has an important meeting coming up, text them that day to wish them SharekAlomre.Com well. If he runs out of sugar in his tea, remember that and make him the best cup every time. If you feel unable to do so, use a diary or a calendar.
You met on a dating site. You exchanged emails, maybe phone calls. So much so that you have decided to take the plunge, bringing your relationship into the real world, concretely material and ruthlessly palpable. You can’t wait to be there, of course, to finally meet him/her, to see him/her in the flesh… but… how can I put it? You’re afraid… It’s new, it’s uncertain, it’s vaguely mysterious, it drives you crazy. So, how do you defeat the monster of the Unknown?
The first thing to do is to realize that all this unknown that scares you so much is actually not so unknown.
– This single person you are going to find, you already know him/her. Even if you have never been in front of each other, you have read his/her profile, you have seen photos, you liked him/her, you exchanged emails, you chatted, you phoned… All of this is known, exchanges on which you can base yourself to face the first appointment.
– The situation also, you already know it. It’s not your first date. And even if it’s your first date with someone you met on the internet, it’s still a date.
Between two people who want to get to know each other better: you know what it is, how it is, how that happens. You can enjoy yourself or not, like yourself or not, the outcome is uncertain; the general setting of the encounter, on the other hand, is something you know, and shouldn’t scare you.
– Have a very simple sophrology session: imagine the place where you will see yourself, visualize your arrival, his; try to project yourself into this meeting, watching it like a movie, where everything happens for the best in the best of all possible worlds. If it works for athletes, why wouldn’t it work for you?
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Turn fear into impatience – Harm Your Relationship
Ask yourself this question: is your life, as you are living it at the moment, satisfactory to you in every way, absolutely perfect and to be honest, heavenly? If your answer is no, you would like to change even some aspect of your life. And change is a step into the unknown, it is, whether you like it or not, the unknown becoming known… Suddenly, the fact that the unknown awaits you at this meeting is something quite positive! This is a sign that change is on the way! So why not see it with enthusiasm, like a surprise gift wrapped in that packaging that you saw in the photo, that you liked and, admit it, that you are dying to unpack, slowly…
